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Monday, November 22, 2010

Flash Report: Mixed Results @ The Gulf Coast Theater by Bob in Biloxi














Doc here with a Flash report from regular and prolific field reporter, Bob in Biloxi.  Bob and I both happened to be at The Paris Theater in Portland, OR on Halloween weekend, and witnessed the poor behavior of some of the patrons there that weekend.

Did Bob's luck change? He's sounds a little cranky...  Let's find out...
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Hi Doc,
Bob here with the Flash report from the Gulf Coast Adult Theater this past weekend.  Somewhat slow by your recent adventures, but any night the women show up is a great night in my book.

Started off early, (7pm) with a slim blonde lady playing with her husband. One of the regular chatty black guys sat down next to them and started talking to them. She seemed uninterested at first, then he pulled his cock out and she got really uninterested and they left. Sound familiar?
Later on that night one small BBW came in with her husband, they sat and enjoyed the show for awhile, when another regular went and sat down beside them. His approach was a little different, as he seemed to just say hello and complement her on the dress she was wearing. After a about a half hour, her husband unleashed what could be the most perfect size G tits on this planet at least! While she was average in looks, her tits were perfect and had the nipples to match those huge orbs.  She spread her legs and was finger fucked by her husband for a while, when two young Hispanic dudes came between the two rows of seats they were occupying, yep you guessed it. That shut down the show.

WTF is wrong with these assholes?? No fucking sense, no fucking class and don’t speak the fucking language??? Believe me, after the couple left, these two were escorted to the door. Fucking dipshits!

Later on that night, the chick that dresses in the Catholic school girl outfit came in, her skirt doesn’t even cover the bottom part of her ass!!!! White button down blouse, half tied around her midriff, no bra, high fuck me heels rounded out her ensemble!  She curled up on the couch with her old man for a while, then some more Hispanic guys (different from the other assholes) came in and started talking loudly in Spanish. 

One left and went to the back couch and starting blowing some other guy, all the while his buddy was standing close to the couple shouting something to him in Spanish.  So that little gay parade killed it for them, and she will usually fuck the whole theater if her master tells her too. Again WTF!!!
So I went down the street to the ABS, it in itself is turning into a gay social club, what with all the happy fellows conversing about the latest fashion, who’s who and whatever the fuck else they can find to chat about.  (Reminds of the guys at the Paris talking about fucking basketball while a couple was in the Oasis)  Annoying at best, but at least they weren’t in their normal cock-blocking -mode, and in the first booth was a couple.  I’ll be damned if there wasn’t a guy with the door open, just looking in the hole! WTF!  When he saw me come up to the booth, she/he scrammed and I was able to secure the adjoining booth. And yes, she was talented and got covered with Bob’s baby batter. Thank you madam!

In closing, I know the readers of your column are not guilty of the sins of bad etiquette, dumb ass behavior and probably speak English, nor do they act like they are right out of the hood, so my rant will fall on the wrong ears and probably be viewed as racist. If so, that is not my intent, but merely part of the report.  So in the immortal words of John Wayne, “Life’s tough, it’s a lot tougher if you’re stupid!"

Or whoever the fuck said it !!
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Guess we have our answer... The epidemic of bad adult theater behavior is not limited to Portland and Dallas.  I read a report from Buffalo that was almost identical to Bob's experience last weekend.

What can we do?  I published a Guide to Adult Theater Etiquette on Sunday.  Maybe posting it inside the theaters (which has been proposed by other readers) might help.  In my opinion, better policing of the theaters by the staff might help. 

In the meantime, let's keep our fingers crossed that this problematic issue eventually goes away.

Thanks,
Doc