Sunday, September 12, 2010

House Call: The Good Doctor Plunges Into Michigan: Romantix in Battle Creek

Doc here with a long overdue entry in the "House Calls" section of The Journal of Adult Theaters. I am backed up with several House Calls, but I have decided to go in reverse order in getting them on the site.As many of you know, The Good Doctor travels the nation with his practice. Coast to coast, border to border. Bada-bing, bada-boom. As I visit the many cities and towns in this great country, I dive into the dark underbelly of each locale. Utilizing the resources of the extensive database housed inside the control room of my practice (in the Valley near the small women's college), I will locate the nearest adult theater and (if possible) visit and report on my findings.
Two weeks ago, The Good Doctor found himself driving north to the state of Michigan.  During this trip, I calculated that I would be able to hit two adult theaters: Romantix in Battle Creek, and the Cini-Mini II in Grand Rapids.  This House Call is focused on Romantix.

The Lizardo 3000 was gassed up and before I knew it, I pulled into the parking lot of Romantix...
The set up of Romantix is pretty interesting.  Parking is located at the rear of the business, and is well-lit and discreet.  You enter down a set of stairs that will plop you right in the middle of the ABS.  The small DVD section lies in the middle between the large arcade area to your left, and the toy/novelty showroom to your right. 

To enter the theater area, one must stop and buy a pass card (like an ATM card) to gain entrance to the theater.  The good news: It's only $6! (The lowest adult theater price I have run across in the country). The Good Doctor slid his card through and presto-chango, I was in. 

From the outside, I surmised that the theater had to be of decent size (my best guess was the size of Airport Video in Seattle).  In all actuality (and the reason I'm a doctor and not a psychic), the theater measured maybe 20'x15'.  The theater has 12 theater-style chairs, and some ample standing room.  The movies are shown on a large screen TV, which provides enough illumination. 
Robin of
"When I Feel Naughty"
For some background on Romantix, this theater (along with a few others) was the setting for the videos of Robin from "When I Feel Naughty" fame back almost 10 years ago.  It's possible the theater was bigger back then (if any of the readers of The Journal has more info, please e-mail me). So, needless to say, I was a bit disappointed in the size of the theater. 

Now the good news:  When I entered, I saw immediately that there was a couple involved in the 2nd row.  A 30-something brunette with long hair in a ponytail was stark naked with the exception of a black g-string.  Standing in front of her was her guy friend, who was quite a bit older than she.  The brunette has a slim athletic body, and looked a bit like Stephanie Zimbalist.  She was giving her friend a wet, noisy blow job.  After a few minutes of this attention, he blasted away in her mouth. Following this display they got dressed in rear-record time and vacated the premises.
Now please keep in mind this was a Wednesday night...Not a typical hot night in western Michigan. 

  • Safe and discreet parking behind store

  • Very reasonable admission to theater ($6)

  • Very clean store and theater

  • Very friendly staff

  • Couples friendly

  • Theater is tiny

  • Arcade very dark

  • Tuesday and Thursday Gay films only (this blog is focused on hetero adult theater fun, thus the "con")
Highly Recommended
Next House Call up will be the Cini-Mini II in Grand Rapids.


Flash Report: Brent Reports On Labor Day Weekend @ The Paris in Portland, Part 1

Doc here with Part 1 of Brent's Labor Day Weekend Report from The Paris Theater in Portland, OR.  This report (along with Part 2, which will follow in the next day or so), showcase the writing talents of Mr. Brent, and why he is the poet laureate of "this thing of our's".

So jump in the way back machine and set the controls to last weekend...

Friday, September 3, 2010 was a good night for adult theater sex action at The Paris. I arrived early. At 6:45pm a good looking couple came into the theater. She was wearing a blue and white sun dress. She looked a little like Minka Kelly who plays Lyla Garrity on " Friday Night Lights".
They mostly sat in the gay theater and watched the man on man. He jacked off. She sat demurely.
Occasionally, they went into the main theater and sat in the couples section.There were no other couples there. My guess is they were looking for a good looking bi couple or a good looking bi male. No such luck, early Friday evening. They left when a skinny guy dropped his pants and jacked off a few inches away from them in the gay theater.

After they left another couple came in and played alone for a while. She was a thin sexy woman with short hair. She wore a knee length skirt . They made out and he fingered her and played with her breasts. Her legs were spread and her skirt was hiked up. She had nice legs.

I thought they were going to stay and play with the boys but I was mistaken. They left after thirty minutes. I have trouble predicting the outcome of any sporting event. The action got better as the evening progressed. Here are some highlights I gathered while watching the action from my illegal perch. ( a good place to watch but a lousy place to participate). A pretty blond and her man who I had not seen in a while came into the theater. I call them The Biker Couple From Washington. She wore a sexy blackdress with black fuck me stockings and please come fuck me heels. She looked smoking hot. I wondered where they were coming from? A bar? A strip club? Sesso? Angels?

In the past, She has taken a lot of hard cocks inside her wet pussy, hot ass and hungry mouth at The Paris. Friday she only fucked her man, although she did suck this big guy who was their guest in the couples section. She also deep kissed him , something I find more exciting than fucking- making out with a man's wife in an adult theater. That is hot.

A young woman, who reminded me of Bjork, came into The Paris with her boyfriend. She had straight up pointy tits and long sturdy, sexy legs. She wore a pair of over sized glasses. A disguise? I wonder. She and her man got nearly naked. She kept her boots on while he fucked her in various positions. They also provided examples of dick sucking and pussy eating to the throng by the rail. He lay her on the front bench and pretty soon hands were reaching through the slats and fingering her ass, her pussy, her tits and her legs while she sucked his cock. She reached into the crowd and played with a few good dicks. She
definitely could handle the hard truth. At one point I watched her get fucked while she played with her breasts. I noticed that she gently caressed along the edges of her nipples and lightly cupped her pretty hands over her breasts. Her skin must have been very sensitive to the touch.

Paris Theater
circa 1982
One of the regulars , Coke Can, came in with a woman who looked a little like Whoopi Goldberg, except younger and hotter. They came in with another couple. Throughout their visit, the girls played with each other, kissed, ate each others pussies and played with each others' tits. The other guy fucked both his girl ( a self confident BBW) and Young Whoopi. Coke Can fucked Young Whoopi.but not the other girl. Young Whoopi also got fucked by a guy she invited into the couples section. It was the same skinny kid who had gotten too close to the first couple hours earlier in the gay theater. This time he got lucky. He must have fucked her hard and fast for an hour.

While all this was happening a beautiful lady , wearing a red dress came in with her man. She had long dark hair and a lovely face, like Julianna Marguillies ( The Good Wife). They played in the couples section but she never showed much of her body. Guys were begging to see her ass. It looked round and full under her dress. Her legs were long and womanly. Her husband ate her pussyso we got to see her soft flesh and her legs spread wide. It was both frustrating and tantalizing.

Now here is the kicker. While they were cuddled in the corner , she was shyly checking out Coke Can's monster dick. Her man motioned him over so she could get a better look. Coke Can started stroking and pretty soon she wrapped her pretty fingers around it. Then she leaned forward and started sucking it. She alternated between sucking her husband;s dick and Coke Can's dick. She must have sucked those two cocks for a good twenty minutes.

Shy and demure? Yeah, right. I'm sure.

The final show of the night came late Friday/ early Saturday when a young hip musician couple paid a visit. She was thin and muscular, with a nice blend of soft and sinewy to her body. She had an interesting face, unusually pretty, like Sandra Bernhardt She had small breasts with big sensitive nipples. She started out by playing with them like she was trying to stretch them out. Then she took off the rest of her clothes and gave the audience a slow, Thai Chi type masturbation dance. It was different and it was very erotic.

When I left the theater it was almost 4am. I should have stayed the night there because some of the best Saturday action took place during that very next day at The Paris. I was told , and it was also reported on The Internet, that Ms.Full Swing came in around noon, Saturday, September 4th. She is a sexy woman with big tits and a turbo sex drive. She looks a lot like Sigourney Weaver. She fucked and sucked every guy who was there and who was up to it. She mostly played on the exam table. There were a few other couples and they also played. I was told that at one point, this sexy little slut was eating MS Full's warm wet pussy while the boys were clusterd around them.

I was also told by at least two lucky bucks that Ms Full Swing's twatchamacallit tasted wonderful.

The only downside to the afternoon was there weren't enough able dicked men to really satisfy her. But, she wrote that she had a great time, Saturday . I hope I'm there for her next visit.

Saturday evening at The Paris reminded me that, even if there are a lot of couples in the theater, that does not mean that there is going to be full tilt theater sex action. Sometimes, it's a more subtle scene. One man brought in two very beautiful Latina's, who were dressed elegantly. One of the ladies, a
Carmen Electra type , wore a micro mini dress. They sat and watched the movie and held hands. It was all very proper and frustrating to the crowd by the landing.

A black couple, also dressed to the nines came in. They sat quietly and watched the award winning cinema, not wanting to miss a stroke. He had his hand draped over her shoulder and was caressing her breasts through her dress. Her hand was resting on the outside of his pants. They were at The Paris for at least two hours.It was as if they were watching an adult movie in a regular theater or in one of the adult theaters around the country that is susceptible to raids from local law enforcement.

Bend Over Girl, aka Silver Girl dropped by Saturday. She is tall, with big tits a great ass , great legs and a sex drive that gets stronger and healthier every year. There must have been thirty men around her or lined up to fuck her. They were the only couple there for the hour and a half that they played and I think she liked it that way. I'm not sure how many guys fucked her. Someone said that she had been in The Oregon Theater earlier so she already had taken a theater load of cock.

An older blond with short curly hair came in Saturday. She had a tight sexy body. She looked like Glenn Close. At one point she had her shirt up and her tight pants half way down her ass. Her man had pushed their play bench up against the wood railing and she was stroking dicks through the slats while being felt up. It was a big turn on watching her raise her sexy ass in the air, and get felt up by this weird human octopus.

Finally they moved away from the throng and took off the rest of their clothes. She had a nice tight body that looked even better au natural. Her breasts were small firm and pointed straight up. They looked real. Her ass was tight and ready. She was very horny from all of the hands and fingers that had been playing with her and from all of the cocks she had been playing with. When he stuck his dick in her it sounded hot wet and sticky. He fucked her, doggy style, for about fifteen minutes, long enough to get a lot of the guys watching to a happy ending. He gave it a few more thrusts, let out a moan and came deep inside her vagina. She reached for a paper towel, wiped her come filled pussy, put on her panties and the rest of her clothes, smiled a big satisfied smile and walked out of The Paris with her Saturday evening still ahead of her.

Although Saturday was slow by a lot of standards, a lot of couples still came to visit. It reminded me that couples and single ladies experience The Paris Theater and theater sex at their own pace and comfort level. The lady who sits quietly with her man during one visit, may return another time when there is more action and get together with another couple or even venture out of the couples' section and "do" the entire theater. There are a lot of variables involved in adult theater sex `occurring', including environmental factors, the over all mood of the crowd, the compatibility and manners of the single men, and the activity level of the other couples and singles.

This is what I love about theater sex. The unpredictability of it all..

Oh and also the fact that 90 percent of the population has no fucking idea that any of "this thing of ours" even exists any more.

Late Sunday, September 5th, I was sure this couple came to The Paris to watch porn to play and put on a show for the boys, but there was already a group of four girls and three guys watching "Anime", so they left. Oh well. It was close to closing time and all of the action had happened hours before around 5 and 6. A sexy blond with short hair dropped by with her man to put on a show for the dozen or so dick waggers and bone jawers around 5. He teasingly told the boys that he might bring her back next time and "she'll fuck every guy in here."

Then , a sexy blond with a great body- she looks like Christie Brinkley/ Kristen Johnson stopped by to play .She got naked sucked her man off and gave him her hand while he gave her his. She was naked on the bench near the rail and guys were reaching in to feel her perfect tits while her husband munched away at her bare wet vagina She was also jacking guys off by reaching behind her and stroking the nearest hard cock she could find. She looked like she was enjoying the multifaceted stimulation until suddenly she sat up, grabbed some towels and wiped the jizz out of her hair. Or at least I think it was jizz. Her head had been very close to the rail and a lot of hard dicks for about an hour.

I'm not sure what made her stop playing, Sunday? Did the wind change or something? At least She was smiling when they left and her nipples were still hard, sticking out of her white shirt.

One lady, standing in line at Voodoo Doughnuts, watched them walk out of The Paris and had a sort of puzzled, surprised and amazed look on her face, like "What goes on in that place?"

A few hours later a young couple came in. She had long brown hair and a nice young body. She gave him a blow job and he fucked her in various positions . She kept her shirt on and pulled her pants down but not off. It was a show but it wasn't a show.

The weather has cooled off a little so The Paris is comfortable again. September and October are very pleasant months in Portland and the sex inside of the adult theaters has been traditionally very good.
I'm looking forward to the Vancouver Canada couples visit. Is it this week or next?