Thursday, May 26, 2011

Flash Report: The Captain Sounds The Collision Horn on Adult World in Rensselaer, NY

Doc here with another fisherman's platter of a Flash Report from that crusty old seadog, The Captain.  Cappy stays close to home port, and hits Adult World in Rensselaer, NY.

One of the things about The Captain's reports that warms The Good Doctor's heart is his colorful descriptions of adult theater sexcapades.  Today's magic word is: spit-roasting.

So put on your rain slicker and enjoy the latest from the Captain...


Ahoy Doc!

I've been busy scraping barnacles (yep, that's what the kids call it these days) with my good arm while my injury heals from that Friday night anchor hoisting incident a few weeks ago. I think if my physical therapist wasn't a living breathing barbie doll I'd get better a lot quicker.

I've been making a few stops into our local bookstore with a mini theater, Adult World at 275 Columbia Turnpike, in Rensselaer, NY (right across the river from downtown Albany). It's actually been a bit busy for couples action.

The real Laura Prepon
We've had a tall red-head who looked a bit like the tall red head on That 70's show.  She went into the booths area around 4pm on a Friday and started blowing her boyfriend, leaving the door open for anyone to watch. Several of us stepped in and were treated to a fabulous tongue swirl technique that brought us to completion quite quickly and she went back to working on her boyfriend. They left after a 30 minute stay.

Another couple stopped in on a Wed night and she took on 7 guys in the theater who enjoyed spit-roasting her, doggy-style was available in the first row where she leaned on the seat and bent over forward towards the second row to offer her mouth. She was very enthusiastic, but kept the moaning a bit muffled. Her husband directed the action as to who got to do what, but all of us enjoyed ourselves and she promised to return soon. Given that it's a Wednesday as I write this I'll be sure to personally visit tonight to see if the promise was kept.

Last Saturday a mature couple stopped in on their 21-speed road bikes (yep, pedal power). He went inside to investigate and she sat down outside right next to the front door smoking area and several of us chatted her up. They went inside together after she had finished her hydration break and she treated us to some quick oral pleasures for about 20mins before they had to hit the road.

I'm planning a trip down river to Cinema Art in Hartford on Fathers Day to be able to give a first-hand account of the festivities.

Signing off the ship's radio with a seaman's favorite dual meaning phrase......... "She's going down!"

The Captain


Doc here again... Thanks to The Captain for his yeoman's effort in this report.  The Captain is not only consistent, he can drop anchor with the best of them.  He's professional and personable.  He's The Captain.

Do you have an adult theater report, past or present?  Just drop Dolph Lungren  The Good Doctor an e-mail at I will assist you in editing and formatting your report, and maybe even drop in a photo or two.  Your provide the raw report, and get the glory.